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What to get the person that has everything? How about a Beer Bath?

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by Bruce of Brews on Dec 10, 2010 in Culture
What to get the person that has everything? How about a Beer Bath?

For some, simply relaxing after work or dinner with a beer is enough. But for others, their enthusiasm for beer teeters on the border of insanity and complete genius. If simply introducing beer into your body internally by drinking it isn’t enough, and you feel the urge to submerge your entire person into several gallons of it in a hops ridden frenzy, then a trip to Europe might just be for you.

“Beer health centers” are establishments where one can be treated to therapeutic beer baths, which are supposed to have multiple health benefits. The first of these health centers sprouted up in the Czech Republic when family owned brewery Chodovar decided that beer indulgence needed to be taken to the next level.

The bathes are supposed to help your skin and hair, but lets face it, the only real reason you are getting in is because it’s filled with beer. At some point in the life of an avid beer drinker, they find themselves sipping on a frothy beverage and the idea of taking a bath in it becomes increasingly appealing.

There is a problem that arises when concerning beer baths, and it is the duality between wasting beer by bathing in it, and drinking it. So the real question becomes: are beer baths alcohol abuse? Is wasting our precious hops on bathing sacrilegious or even evil? Will the powerful yet benevolent beer gods smite us, dooming us to an eternity of flat, tasteless, ’lite’ beers, in beer hell?

Let us examine the facts;
-The bathing beer is unique and specifically brewed for bathing in, it is 2% ABV, with special properties for added aromas
-It is added to mineral water in one of six titanium tubs and heated to 34 degrees Celsius (that’s around 93 Fahrenheit).
-In addition to the beer and water, hops, yeast, and other herbs are also added.
-The session is twenty minutes in a tub, and a twenty minute relaxation period after.
-You can also imbibe Chodovar beer while taking a bath, and after. Weekend packages are also offered.
-You are bathing in beer.

This interesting, yet emasculated beer experience has everything working against it. By bathing in it we are wasting beer (it is frowned upon to drink your bath water, though you may be tempted to), and sullying more ingredients by putting in hops and yeast.

On the other hand, while it is true that these ingredients could be used for the noble cause of beer consumption, the bath beer is watered down to only 2% ABV, and since you can also drink Chodovar’s house lager while soaking, it can be concluded that bathing in beer is a tool that aids in the experience of drinking beer, much like guacamole, pretzels, and/or football. The beer gods, while vengeful, are also forgiving and will hopefully understand.

12.10.10
 

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