THE DRINK NATION IS A FREE RESOURCE FOR FINDING EVERYTHING AWESOME ABOUT DRINKING IN YOUR LOCATION
The Drink Nation Home Bar Project Cover

Return Your Unwanted Gifts...For Booze

by Ryan Hudak on Dec 29, 2014 in Culture

If there is one thing that rings true every Christmas along with the family, friends, overeating, gifts, and napping, it’s that you’re going to get a gift you don’t like. Or a gift that isn’t even close to being the right size for you. The first—and easiest—instinct is always to take it back to the store it came from and exchange it for something at that store. But that’s what lazy people do—and that’s not going to get you any alcohol. We’ve put together a quick guide of your unwanted items and how to get the most bang for your (free) buck after all the wrapping paper is gone.

Socks and Underwear 
Christmas is supposed to be fun, isn’t it? If I wanted socks and underwear, I’d go buy it myself on any random Tuesday. I want something that’s going to make me happy on Christmas. Gather up any undergarments some enterprising significant other got for you and send them back—two packages should come out to right around $15. Now, take that $15 to any local bottle shop and pick yourself up a nice six-pack…or two okay six-packs. Or a really crappy case of beer. Either way, beer is better than socks.

A Tie
If you’re a dad and you have kids, you’ll probably get a tie. Hopefully the kids didn’t skimp on it and you can return it for around $30—which should be enough to get a nice case of local craft beer, or at least really offset the price of one. If not, go out and get two bottles of wine—you can find some great bottles in the $12-15 range. Good thing you got that tie for Christmas!

An Ill-Fitting Sweater 
Sure, it’s a nice sweater and it’s got a famous guy’s name on it, but the sleeves are just a little too short. Great! Sneak out later in the week and get someone else’s $60 back so you can swing up to the liquor store. Now, that nice bottle of Scotch or bourbon you’ve been eying up? Looks like Santa got you exactly what you wanted, just a little late. Or extremely early.

An Engagement Ring
When you’re done rolling your eyes, be sure to tell your “fiancée” to quit being lazy—there are about 350 days of the year that aren’t already holidays. Tell them to be original and pick one of them instead of Christmas, and then to return the ring and get you a home Brew Cave. It will show their love much more than a ring.

A New Car
You woke up on Christmas morning to find a car with a bow outside? BO-RING. You’ve already got a car, and besides—you live in the city where public transportation is the way to go and parking is a bear. Thanks for making your life more stressful! Now take that parking ticket generator back to the dealership and go nuts—get yourself a couple bottles of Pappy, a few Utopias, or The Macallan 55 year old in a Lalique Crystal Decanter, which retails for about $12,000.

A Puppy
Actually, keep the puppy. But teach it to fetch you a beer when needed.

Photo via Flickr


Tags: Beer, Cocktails, Gifts, Holiday, Spirits
Recent Articles

Feedback

How are we doing? Tell us what you like or don't like and how we can improve. We would love to hear your thoughts!

*Name:
*E-mail:
*Suggestions:
 
Behind the Bar: Kat Corbo of The Study & Winner of Speed Rack 2019

Behind the Bar: Kat Corbo of The Study & Winner of Speed Rack 2019

This time on Behind the Bar, we spoke to Kat Corbo of The Study, who recently won Speed Rack 2019....read more ›

by The Drink Nation May 15, 2019
Boston Beer & Dogfish Head Have Merged in a $300 Million Deal

Boston Beer & Dogfish Head Have Merged in a $300 Million Deal

In a huge move for the American craft beer community, Boston Beer and Dogfish Head have agreed to a merger valued at $300 million dollars. ...read more ›

by The Drink Nation May 10, 2019
A New, High-End Blend of Jack Daniel's Whiskey is Now Available in the United States

A New, High-End Blend of Jack Daniel's Whiskey is Now Available in the United States

A new, high-end blend of Jack Daniel's whiskey, known as Jack Daniel's No. 27 Gold, which was previously only ...read more ›

by The Drink Nation Apr 15, 2019
SPONSORED
Drink Nation Store Rectangle
Coopers' Craft Bourbon Is Now Available in 12 States With a New Barrel Reserve Expression

Coopers' Craft Bourbon Is Now Available in 12 States With a New Barrel Reserve Expression

Coopers' Craft Kentucky Straight Bourbon has debuted an entirely new label design, has expanded to more states...read more ›

by The Drink Nation Apr 3, 2019
PBR is Making Its Own Whiskey For the Perfect Shot & Beer Combo

PBR is Making Its Own Whiskey For the Perfect Shot & Beer Combo

Pabst Blue Ribbon has filed documents to create its very own whiskey, making for the perfect shot & beer combo....read more ›

by Drink Philly Mar 18, 2019
Behind the Bar: Tory Pratt of Pratt Standard

Behind the Bar: Tory Pratt of Pratt Standard

In this edition of Behind the Bar, we chatted with Tory Pratt, the founder of Pratt Standard....read more ›

by The Drink Nation Mar 7, 2019
Acclaimed Director Ridley Scott Has Made Seven Short Films for Hennessy X.O.

Acclaimed Director Ridley Scott Has Made Seven Short Films for Hennessy X.O.

Ridley Scott has directed a four-minute short film for Hennessy X.O. visualizing the seven flavors of the high...read more ›

by The Drink Nation Mar 4, 2019
Behind the Bar: Chris Morris, Master Distiller of Woodford Reserve

Behind the Bar: Chris Morris, Master Distiller of Woodford Reserve

On this edition of Behind the Bar, we had the honor to sit down with Chris Morris, the master distiller at Woo...read more ›

by The Drink Nation Feb 28, 2019
Haagen-Dazs is Making Booze-Infused Ice Cream

Haagen-Dazs is Making Booze-Infused Ice Cream

Step aside, after dinner drinks - Haagen-Dazs is releasing a line of spiked ice cream....read more ›

by The Drink Nation Feb 19, 2019
Take a Tequila Tour Through Mexico on Jose Cuervo's New 'Tequila Train'

Take a Tequila Tour Through Mexico on Jose Cuervo's New 'Tequila Train'

If you love tequila and traveling in style, you're in luck - Jose Cuervo has a new all-you-can-drink tequila t...read more ›

by The Drink Nation Feb 19, 2019
SPONSORED
View all Articles

Sign up to get weekly drinking news, bar reviews, events and more sent directly to your inbox!

Close